Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Spain and Ghana Go Out Of The FIFA World Cup (TM) 2006 By Virtue Of Scoring Less Goals Than France and Brazil Respectively

Today's title is a reaction to Pooch's incessant search for football related puns. This has all been prompted by the Guardian podcast. An otherwise good game was spoiled for me by his lengthy attempts to work the name "Torres", into some sort of valid pun involving bulls or something. It wasn't clear where he was trying to go with it.

France 3 - 1 Spain

Kev, Pooch, Arun and I watched the France v Spain game in Bar Sol Ona, which is fittingly a pun itself I guess, with the Spanish and a few French. France were at the most impressive I'm seen them this tournament, but I was sorry to see Spain go - particularly Torres who I'd like to see more of - in a purely footballing scenario.


Brazil 3 - 0 Ghana

Brazil outclassed Ghana in the afternoon game. I've heard reports that Ghana maybe deserved to win but they played with a ridiculously high defensive line which gave Brazil about ten one-on-ones. Brazil could have scored a lot more.

Diving / Feigning Injury

It occurred to a couple of us recently that there may be a solution to the problem of players diving and feigning injury.

Under our new proposal, following any prolonged period of lying on the turf (say 5 seconds), the player must leave the pitch - and here's the genius part - and is not allowed to return until he's completed a lap of the pitch.

That would put the feigner in a quandary as he has to decide whether to continue pretending to be injured as he limps around his lap of the pitch, thus further delaying his return to the game. If the player really is injured then he won't mind a bit of a chance to run off the injury before entering the fray again.

I can't see any flaws with it.


Comments:
Hmmm - I like the idea of the laps Joe.
Maybe we should institute them at Clapham Common Footy and see how well it goes and report back to FIFA...
 
Possible puns I came up with:
(not all of them applicable to the actual result or circumstances of the match)



Torres time for Spain

Spain in pain as Torres fails to take the bull by the horns

Francy pants Zidane shows Francy footwork

A right Raul drubbing

Wiltord get a grip?

You must be Joaquin

Reina on plane as Spain are in pain


I'll get my coat...
 
For a Torres pun, why look any further than Denning's effort when playing a certain Playstation-based football game a couple of years ago... "The Tories are back"
 
That makes me think I was too quick to dismiss Pooch's efforts
 
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